Monday, November 24, 2008

Tucson Roller Derby Wheelies Results

The 2008 Tucson Roller Derby Wheelies were presented at a fabulous sock-hop ceremony last Friday, 21 Nov., at Hotel Congress.  Serge and Jeff were on hand to MC the affair.  

Ladies & Gentlemen, Your 2008 Wheelies award winners (in order of appearance).

Best Legs: Sgt. Pepper Spray (VS)
Rookie Of The Year:  Myna N. Possession (VS)
Best Ass:  Carrie Gunns (VS)
Best Tattoos:  Anita Donut (VS) 

Favorite Roller Derby Girl:  Cheap Ore (CQ)
Sweetest Roller Girl:  Polly Graf (VS)
Most Improved Roller Girl:  Bianka Truhl (IC)
Meanest Roller Girl:  Deadlock Doe (FTW)

Spirit Award:  Sunni Side Up (FTW)
Best Injury:  Bionic Barbie (?)
TRD Triple Threat (Pivot/Blocker/Jammer):  Dirty Teri
Favorite Team:  Vice Squad

Iron Curtain (IC) Awards
Best Pivot:  Kamanda
Best Blocker:  Dot Stoevsky
Best Jammer:  Kassi Nova

Furious Truckstop Waitresses (FTW) Awards
Best Pivot:  Deadlock Doe
Best Blocker: Sassy Sue
Best Jammer: Sloppy Flo

Copper Queens (CQ) Awards
Best Pivot: Dirty Teri
Best Blocker: Blue Mauli
Best Jammer:  Cheap Ore

Vice Squad (VS) Awards
Best Pivot:  Carrie Gunns
Best Blocker: Helen Wheels
Best Jammer: Sami Automatic

Saddletramp Awards
Best Pivot:  Helen Wheels
Best Blocker:  Helen Wheels
Best Jammer:  Sami Automatic

Most Valuable Player (MVP) By Team
Saddletramps:  Sami Automatic
Iron Curtain:  Kassi Nova
Furious Truckstop Waitresses:  Deadlock Doe
Copper Queens:  Dirty Teri
Vice Squad:  Sami Automatic
 
Overall Tucson Roller Derby Awards
Best Pivot:  Deadlock Doe
Best Blocker:  Sassy Sue
Best Jammer:  Sami Automatic
Most Valuable Player:  Sloppy Flo

Congratulations to all the Wheelie recipients.  It should be noted that Roller Girls prefer to keep their statements on the track as most acceptances were a quick thanks and dash off the stage.

With the completion of the awards, the retirement of Dr. Z Onatopp (IC), Sloppy Flo (FTW), Ruby Hellcat (FTW), and Doris Badenov (IC), was announced.  They were cheered profusely for their years with TRD.  

Also a massive THANKS to all the Tucson Roller Derby skaters, support staff, fans, friends, and family from the Bombshelters for making TRD exist and so much FUN.

That's a wrap on the 2008 TRD season.  From what I've gathered so far, there are a lot of team shake-ups for 2009, and the schedule should be coming out soon.

'Ta For Now,

Don Bombshelter 

Monday, November 17, 2008

Gotham Beast Satisfied

The 2008 WFTDA National Champion is the Gotham Girls Roller Derby. In a third dominating bout, they defeated the Windy City Rollers, GGRD 134, WCR 66. Gotham kept the normally high scoring WCR to only 29 points in the first half, with 63 of thier own. Then continued to build with a 71-37 run in the second. While WCR did better than the other Gotham opponents this weekend (Duke lost by 157, and Philly by 135), it was clear that Gotham are currently a class unto themselves. Congratulations to Gotham on a fantastic run. They were presented with the new WFTDA Championship trophy which will go with each years winner. It is officially named, "The Hydra" after flat track founder and incredibly dedicated supporter, Hydra from the original Texas Rollergirls. VERY COOL!!!

The East completed thier sweep in the first bout on Sunday, where Philly took out Texas, Philly 114, Texas 95. This one was a battle as Philly lead at the half, Philly 58, Texas 50. Then Texas struggled early in the second period. After the 6th jam of P2, Texas was able to hold Philly scoreless for 8 jams, and brought back to Philly 93, Texas 87 after 14. At the end of 16 jams in P2, it was tied at 95. Philly finally shook off the scoring dry spell in the last two jams while Texas had foul trouble. Philly went 19-0 in the last two jams to win it and complete the domination of the EAST.

This is a reverse of last years results where the West won the top three spots (Kansas City, Rat City, Texas), and only Carolina made it to the top 4 from the East. Dominance in the WFTDA has shifted...for now.

Congratulations to Gotham on thier Championship, and to all the teams for a fun tournament.

Also, special congratulations to Merci Less and Hurt Reynolds. Hurt proposed to Merci after the Philly-Texas bout in a perfect derby setting. As Hurt said, "She's going to kick my ass, but she said Yes!"

Time to pack and get back to Tucson to dry out (in all it's meanings).

Don B.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

East Makes Statement - And One Will Be Champs

In a reverse of last years WFTDA tournament, the East took 3 of the 4 final spots represented by Philly, Windy City, and GOTHAM (dum dum dum). Only Texas survived from the West, although the B.A.D. gals gave Philly a run for the money. Last year only Carolina made it from the East with Texas, Rat City, and Kansas City from the West. It has been clear that the East was no longer the weaker division, and this has been made clear at the Northwest Knockdown. Here's a snapshot of yesterday's action.

Windy City (E2) v. Rat City (W3)
My pre-season champion prediction was Rat City. I expected that they would be hungry to avenge thier loss to Kansas and prove they could play without the massive fouling problem that sometimes troubles them. They also would have "home court" advantage, as I expected a massive turnout in Portland. Well...not so much.

Rat City jumped out ahead in the first jam 12-4. Then a combination of Windy City prowess and Rat City fouling resulted in a 33-0 run in the next 8 jams for Windy City. Unlike the Western Regionals, where Rat City did pretty well in staying out of the penalty box, they seemed to self-destruct early. Windy City took advantage, including a 13-0 jam by Shocka Conduit in the 3rd jam. Rat City finally had 8 more in the 10th jam, where there was no lead jammer, and they had a power jam for a portion. After 10, it's WCR 37, RCRG 20. The trend continued. Windy City played well. Rat City self-destructed. Kola Loka (WCR) added a 10-0 run in the 12th, and 15-0 in the 14th. While Shocka (WCR) was 4-0 in the 13th. Injury was added to this 29-0 run against Rat City when Femme Fatale was ejected for the bout after the 13th jam. After 14 jams, it's WCR 20, RCRG 66. Rat City finds some solace with a 14-4 run in the last two jams by Carmen Getsome and Ann R. Kissed to close it to WCR 70, RCRG 34 at half time.

With the start of Period 2, it didn't take long to see that RCRG had not shaken off whatever was in thier heads from Period 1. Constant penalty box action, and Windy City put the hammer down. It was WCR 135, RCRG 55 after the 10th jam of P2. The MASSIVE RCRG crowd was stunned and the very vocal and energetic WCR fans were going wild. Chants of "Windy City Rocks" would ring out. Also, in the 8th jam, Kola Loka tied the tournament scoring record set at Western Regionals (Kamikaze Kim & Snot Rocket), by going 25-0. Windy City owned this and went 87-29 in P2. Home court was no advantage for Rat City, and they seemed to have lost the discipline they showed at the Western Regionals. Windy City advances to play Texas.

Philly (E3) v. B.A.D. Girls (W2)
A game of two halves. The first period saw Philly getting the jump on the B.A.D. Girls ("We're nice" from thier headbands). An 8-0 by Mo Pain (Philly) in the first jam, then 10-0 by Mo agains in the 4th, and Philly had jumped to a Philly 28, B.A.D. 9 lead. Scoring would slow for the next several jams as Teflon Donna, Mo Pain, and Shenita Stretcher scored 19 for Philly, as Liza Machete, and Kit Turbo added 5 for B.A.D. Philly builds the lead up in Jam #11 with Mo Pain on a 14-0 against Brawlen Angel (B.A.D.). Then back to trade offs for the rest of the period. By the end of P1 (18 jams), it's Philly 75, B.A.D 44. With Pia Mess fouling out in the 15th jam.

Bay Area turned it around in the second. Locking Philly up defensively they only allowed 32 second half Philly points. As the B.A.D. girls kept Philly's scoring controlled, they crawled back into it, reducing the lead to Philly 94, B.A.D. 68 after 10 jams, and then after 19 jams and only time for one jam left, it's Philly 103, B.A.D. 84. Philly just needs to prevent a massive jam by B.A.D and they should have it. Guess what. Mo Pain lines up against Kit Turbo (in her final bout). Both jammers get through and Kit is the Lead Jammer. B.A.D. controls when this jam will end. At some point, Mo is sent to the penalty box and Kit Turbo lights off. She has a power jam to finish this bout. As Kit calls off the jam, the scoreboard shows 103-103. Kit had scored 19 points. The announcers were shouting to wait for the update as any points from Mo had not been posted yet. After a very long pause as the officials reviewed everything, they confirmed Mo had 4 points before going to the penalty box. Philly dodges a BIG bullet, and wins Philly 107, B.A.D 103. Philly advances to play Gotham, in a repeat of the Eastern Semi-Final action.

Texas (W1) V. Windy City (E2)
This is another crazy bout. These two teams were very evenly matched and it showed. The largest point differential was 15 points for the whole bout, and neither team kept a double digit lead for more than one jam. While Rice Rocket (TXRG) scored first (2-0), Eva Dead (WCR)responded with a 12-0 jam in the second jam. The fight was on, as the teams were tied at 13 by Jam #4, and no score in Jam #5. Lucille Brawl exploded for 14-0 in Jam #6 for the biggest Texas lead of the bout. Windy City responded by turning a power jam into 9 unanswered points by Shocka Conduit. Jam #8 goes 8-5 for Texas and ends in a Jammerless Jam as Rice Rocket and then Kola Loka visit the Sin Bin. After 10 jams, it's Texas 39, WCR 29. Texas would build the lead to 13 points after 12. Then Windy City clawed back, holding Texas to only 4 points for the remainder of the period. Meanwhile, Kola Loka, Eva Dead, Athena DeCrime, and would each get Lead Jammer and add 11 points to close it to 4 points, Texas 45, WCR 40. Kola Loka would put WCR ahead to end the period in the 17th, with a 9-0 power jam, while Morphine cooled her jets in the box. It's Texas 45, WCR 49 at the end of one. This could go either way.

Windy City came out in the second and extended their lead. An early 11-0 jump over the first two jams created thier largest lead of the bout, 15 points. Texas responded with a 12-3 jam that had no Lead Jammer between Rice Rocket and Shocka Conduit. Ying O' Fire adds 2 for WCR in the 4th jam and it's Texas 57, WCR 65. Texas gets Lead Jammer for the next three jams and re-takes the lead including a 10-2 run by Rice Rocket. It goes back and forth for a couple of jams, and Texas is ahead by only 2 after the 10th P2 jam, Texas 78, WCR 76. Texas extends their lead in the 11th with a 5-0 run by Rice Rocket. Windy City would then control the jams with Lead Jammer status for all of the remaining regulation jams. While Texas has a 5-4 jam in the 12th, WCR would close over the remaining jams. Taking advantage of power jams in the 13th and 14th, Eva Dead and Kola Loka close it to Texas 88, WCR 86. No score in the 15th. Malice With Chains jams for the first time for WCR in the 16th against Lucille Brawl. Malice has Lead Jammer and is victorious with a 5-3 jam to tie it up at 91. There is time for only one more jam in regulation. Rice Rocket for Texas and Kola Loka for Windy City are on the line. Shortly into the jam Rice Rocket is sent to the Penalty Box and Kola has power jam. Texas swarms on Kola and she finally emerges with Lead Jammer status and calls it. Regulation is over, and it's a tie. Overtime jam, and Texas starts with thier jammer in the box. After a pause to ensure it's all sorted out. Kola lines up agains for WCR, and Rice Rocket is still in the PB. In overtime jams, scoring occurs with the first pass and Kola whips through the pack. Rice Rocket emerges and gets through for some points, and is then sent to the PB again. Kola ends up with 19 to Rice's 4, and WCR wins in overtime, Texas 95, WCR 110. WCR advances to the championship bout.

Gotham (E1) v. Philly (E3)
So far Gotham has shown why they are called the "Beast Of The East" with what can only be called a dismantling of Duke City. Philly played Gotham to a final jam in the Eastern regionals and have an oppurtunity to exact revenge. What can I say. Gotham is on a mission. Similar to the Duke City bout. Gotham disrupted the Philly defense throughout the bout while Bonnie Thunders, Suzy Hotrod, and Cheap Skate show why they are considered some of the best jammers around. Gotham takes the lead from the first jam following thier usual rotation of interchanging Bonnie and Suzy with spots by Cheap Skate and sometimes Fisti Cuffs (Yeah Fisti!). Philly could not score until the 5th jam in a power jam situation, making it Gotham 14, Philly 5. No score in the 5th. Gotham added 13 points over the next 5 jams, and held Philly scoreless until jam #10 where Philly finally had 5 more points. This would be the second of only three jams where Philly scored in the first period. It's Gotham 27, Philly 10. The Gotham machine then went into gear, and scored in every jam but two of the remaining 19 jams. Gotham would add 56 points. Philly had a 9-0 jam by Mo Pain in jam # 13 for the last scoring they would see. At the end of P1, Gotham 83, Philly 19.

Gotham continued the onslaught in the second period. Philly was held scoreless for the first 11 jams of P2, finally scoring 3 points in Jam #12 of P2. Meanwhile, Gotham had built the lead to Gotham 168, Philly 22. Philly continued to fight and had small scores by Mo Pain, Teflon Donna, Robin Drugstores, and Shenita Stretcher, adding 18 points through the 16th jam. Philly was also able to work Gotham into a no scoring dry spell over jams 11 to 15. Small scoring for both teams to wrap it up, with the final Gotham 189, Philly 52. Gotham dismantles Philly almost as efficiently as they did Duke City, and Gotham advances to play Windy City for the Championship. It's a repeat of the Eastern Regionals matchup.

Today starts with Philly v. Texas in the grudge match. Then, we'll see if WCR can figure out how to stop the Gotham Beast. Look for the live feeds at DNN:

http://www.derbynewsnetwork.com/leadjammer

Sorry 'bout any typos, but got's to go. Derby awaits.

Don B.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Top Seeds Dominate

First two bouts are history. Texas defeats Carolina, TXRG 125, CRG 61. Then Gotham dismantles Duke City, GGRD 182, DCD 25.

Carolina (E4) v. Texas (W1)
The first bout saw Texas go ahead by 36-0 after 7 jams in period 1. Carolina could not get anything going, particularly due to a Texas defense disrupting the Carolina pack. Carolina finally got on the boar in the 8th jam with a 4-0 by Roxy Rocket over Rice Rocket. Things got messy with a lot of penalty action on both sides and after the 12th jam ended in a Jammerless Jam, it was TXRG 36, CRG 13. Bloody Mary (TXRG) then put a 12-0 run in the 13th. Carolina would gain some ground as Texas started to fill the Sin Bin, and at the half it was TXRG 52, CRG 36.

The second period featured more penatly action on both sides, but midway through it really took Carolina apart. At one point the refs had to call a timeout to sort out the order of Carolina players to cycle through the box. Continually short handed against the strong Texas team was not a path to a comeback. Carolina would only score in 4 of the 15 second period jams, as Texas used every power jam situation to build the lead. After the 11th second period jam, Texas was up; TXRG 104, CRG 61. That would be the last CRG scoring and it ended 5 jams later; TXRG 125, CRG 61. This was a 73-25 run in the second for Texas.

Duke City Derby (W4) v. Gotham Girls Roller Derby (E1)
Gotham owned this from start to finish. The blocking of the whole team was crushing and kept the Duke pack from ever working effectively together, including a notable performance by Fisti Cuffs. Fisti seems to have a Jammer radar that keeps her in just the right spot to hold up the opposing jammer. With the Duke pack continually disrupted, the Duke jammers of Muffin, Kamikaze Kim, and Meep Meep, could rarely find a path through the pack. The GGRD Jammers of Bonnie Thunders, Suzy Hotrod, and Cheap Skate provided on clinic on offense. Bonnie and Suzy combined for 75 of 98 GGRD first half points. Cheap Skate, Fisti Cuffs, and Sweet Sherry Pie also got thier licks in. After 4 jams, it was GGRD 10, DCD 1. After 10, it was GGRD 56, DCD 4. By the end of P1, GGRD had this one under control, GGRD 98, DCD 8.

Duke did slightly better in Period 2. After 10 jams in P2, it was GGRD 150, DCD 17. So Duke was able to get some scoring going, and had a few jams that they dominated. But this bout is a testament to why GGRD is called the "Beast Of The East". Control of just about every aspect of the track. Gotham put the exclamation point when Surly Temple put a huge block on Muffin sending her sprawling and out of breath. Gotham was not giving an inch from beginning to end. It was a 84-17 run for Gotham in the second with a final of: GGRD 182, DCD 25.

Both top seeds were dominant and focused on preventing any chance of a major upset at this stage. Today Texas will face the winner of Windy City (E2) v. Rat City (W3), and Gotham will face the winner of B.ay A.rea D.erby (W2) v. Philly (E3).

Congratulations to my New Mexico brethren of Duke City. I was very proud of thier effort, fighting to the end. It was great to see the crowd demand a final track skate from them. Cinderella may have left the house for now. But not for long.

Today. Got my Gotham shirt on. Can now root for Ex-TRD'ers Fisti and Hard Anya against BAD or Philly.

'till tomorrow.

Don B.

Friday, November 14, 2008

E. v. W.

Hoohaa! Finally, it's go time. And we're fitting in a visit to Velveteria, the Black Velvet Museum, today.

First bout is at 6:30 PST with (W1) Texas vs. (E4) Carolina. Texas has clearly shown they are on a mission to reclaim thier crown. Carolina has struggled, barely defeating Boston to get in and then getting trounced by Windy City and Philly. This is Texas's bout.

Second bout is at 8:30 PST with (w4) Duke City Derby vs. (E1) Gotham Girls Roller Derby. This one is heart breaking for me. I would love to see both advance. Duke is sistren with Tucson, and they played a scrappy, smart, aggressive bout to defeat Kansas City. ... But Gotham is called the "Beast of the East" for a reason. They feature depth at Jamming and for Defense. A Duke City upset would totally rock, as I think even GGRD would agree if it wasn't on thier watch. I expect to see Fisti Cuffs play a pivotal role as she showed astounding track sense in locking up opposing Jammers. Ability to handle penalties may give Duke City a chance if they keep thier heads as they did with KCRW.

It is not clear whether the Nationals will be simulcast like the Regionals. MavTV will be there to record the event, and that's all I know so far.

UPDATE: Live streaming at: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/northwest-knockdown-live

UPDATE #2: And Boutcast at DNN: http://www.derbynewsnetwork.com/leadjammer

As posted on the NWK site, the countdown is now:

00 Days, 05 Hours, 13 Minutes, 25 Seconds.

Got my Duke City shirt on.

Don B.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Brackets & Pre- Bout Discussion @ DNN

Bombshelters are back from Canada and Seattle and are exploring a predictably wet Portland. Can't wait for Derby action this Friday. Buzz has started at DNN with bracket predictions (look for "mrbombshelter" for mine) from around derby land.

Also the Pre-Bout write up, giving a good account of the path each team took to the Nationals and any history they may have had against each other. So check out the Derby News Network and get your two cents in.

Don B.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Bombshelters Invade Canadia

Getting a jump on the Nationals by heading to the Great North(west) a bit early. We have invaded Canada. Vancouver we are here.

Vancouver is home to the Terminal City Rollergirls. Don't know if we'll run into anyone from thier teams, but we will try and find the diviest of the dives and enjoy the rain. Which it has been doing profusely.

Au voir for now.

Don B.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Tramps Last Bout A Squencher

Thanks to Randi Canyon (also known as Bolshe Vixen) for sending out info on the Tramps final bout of the year.  The results from Denver are:

TRD Saddletramps:  92
RMRG  5280 Fight Club:  96

Here is Randi's write-up:
"Thanks to everyone who has expressed interest and support to the Tramps!  The game in Denver was amazing and we had a great time.

For inquiring minds, there was some confusion and some scoreboard discrepancies that occurred in the last half of the game.

With about 3:09 left in the second half, the Tramps were up by 10 points and Deadlock Doe hit one of the RMRG girls into the boards so hard that their scoreboard came unplugged (the cord was taped along the baseboards where the girl hit into the wall).  The scores and the time were erased from the board.  The scores were put back correctly but the scoreboard op couldn't remember how much time was on the clock.  The referees discussed the issue and none of them could remember the clock saying anything after 4 minutes, 15 seconds on the clock.  Helen Wheels tried to argue the case, but we lost out.

At the last jam, there was 1:37 left on the clock and Tramps were up by 9 points.  At 1.4 seconds left on the clock the op shut the timeclock off to prevent the buzzer from sounding, since we are now playing to the end of the final jam instead of letting the buzzer end the game.  Sami Automatic was jamming against Frida BeatHer (their best, most amazing jammer, of course) and managed to score a few points and gain lead jammer.  Sami was running the time down to prevent another jam from starting and suddenly was pulled for her 4th minor, leaving Frida the only jammer on the track.  Teri and I were at the front of the pack, holding her back and we were quickly approaching 20 feet so I went ahead and decided to take the penalty for engaging her and was consequently put into the penalty box.  At this point, I felt the jam should have long ended since there was only about 30 seconds left in the jam when the scoreboard clock stopped and yet Frida got another pass through the pack before the jam ended.  The scoreboard was updated twice, first time around was 91 RMRG 92 Tramps, second time was 92 Tramps 96 RMRG."

Wow.  What an ending.  I thought this would be a close one, but this certainly was a wacky end.  Thanks to RMRG for hosting TRD.  Congratulations to the Tucson Roller Derby Saddletramps on their 2008 season.   And thanks to Randi for the first hand account.

Don B.

PMFinS:  OBAMA IS THE PRESIDENT ELECT!!!